I like to think that I'll forge out a new identity as a guide to the newcomers. Telling them what it was like in the long, long ago, the before time, when posts where easily accessible and conversations could be followed. I'll tell them the legends of our time, like the way Burt liked certain moustaches and Ubertrout didn't like certain foods. I'll bitterly cling to the old ways even after the forces of Kinja get the rest of you to adapt and simply begin posting your gifs of high cheekboned British actors in new formats.

I'll be known as The Bitter Old Crank and I'll be looked at with scorn and derision until one young poster, the chosen one we'll call her, needs to learn of the past in her quest to defeat Kinja and return us to our simpler time.