Welcome to HEALTH! YEA! (infomercial GIFS, YEA!)

I'm reposting this for the overnight crowd because not only are the infomercial GIFS funny, but the great people who have commented actually find this motivating which makes me really happy.

This past week, Husband and I (and our dog Cooper) have been participating in a program I created called "HEALTH. YEA." "HEALTH. YEA." is a program designed for everyone of any age and any mental condition (because dude, there's snow or poop water everywhere and we're depressed) See hair dryer injury.

Welcome to HEALTH! YEA! (infomercial GIFS, YEA!)

and any general condition of well-being.

What is "Health! Yea" about? It is about doing ONE THING, just ONE THING that you wouldn't do normally in the name of "HEALTH! Yea."

What's that you say?

Welcome to HEALTH! YEA! (infomercial GIFS, YEA!)

You can't do one thing!?!?! (I mean look at you, you can't hold a fucking tape measure without falling down.)

Well nearly ANYTHING CAN BE THAT ONE THING!!! As long as you wouldn't be doing it on any other day! You take your dog out for a walk because what are you, some kind of Monster? (See headless man with dog)

Welcome to HEALTH! YEA! (infomercial GIFS, YEA!)

Take your dog for ONE MORE BLOCK on his walk and there you go! HEALTH! YEA.

Welcome to HEALTH! YEA! (infomercial GIFS, YEA!)

YES! THERE IS A BETTER WAY!!! Team Cat? Your one thing can be to use non-stick spray on your frying pan instead of butter when you cook your dozens and dozens of eggs!

Welcome to HEALTH! YEA! (infomercial GIFS, YEA!)

You say, "KABarrick, I'm a healthy individual who only occasionally has problems eating tacos (see woman unable to eat taco). What can you POSSIBLY teach ME about health?" Well, YOU sir or madam (you're wearing a hat so I can't tell) are a decision making machine. Maybe these decisions are even common knowledge and simply INSTINCT for you. Fantastic! But you too know that everyone has something that needs improvement. Make a decision to make dinner at home instead of going out. Drink coffee? How about a tea? Everything is perfect about you? How about bringing some of your delicious organic canned food (bought at a local co-op natch) to a local food bank? You're so amazing that you don't even buy too much food? How about opening the door for the person entering the building behind you? You're not a guy? Fuck that. Chivalry isn't just for men!

For the overachiever or those blessed to be motivated, you can scratch off that one thing early on and keep going throughout the day. It's about making a CONSCIOUS choice to do a healthier thing. You look at the escalator at Target and think "ooh, I love fake stairs!" How about just walking up those stairs? No promises about all the time or forever. Just this ONE TIME.

"KABarrick," you say, "I too am surrounded by poop water and feel like crap. Is 'Health! Yea" a program I can use? Why yes it is! (see lady who doesn't know how hair works)

Welcome to HEALTH! YEA! (infomercial GIFS, YEA!)

Let's say you're depressed like me. First, sorry! It sucks, right?!?! No energy. No motivation. Maybe you're ordering food because it's easier. How about buying a bag of frozen vegetables with a sauce that all you have to do is microwave? They even have ones with CHEESE!!! "HEALTH! YEA." (See man with cheetoh disaster)

Welcome to HEALTH! YEA! (infomercial GIFS, YEA!)

Is your place a mess because of whatever reason? (See woman attacked by tupperware)

Welcome to HEALTH! YEA! (infomercial GIFS, YEA!)

FINE! Your "HEALTH! YEA." goal doesn't have to be where it's most needed, it just has to be SOMEWHERE. You could fill ONE garbage bag with trash and take it out or you could walk down the street to treat yourself to a cup of coffee! Physical health, mental health, dietary health. Whatever you can apply health to is up for grabs.

Don't forget, this is just ONE DECISION! You're not making a life change, just making one decision.

Sure, life changes are full of making those choices but THEY'RE SO MANY CHOICES! We're not about DOING ALL THE THINGS! We're just doing ONE thing. If you want to do more, that's up to you.

Will "Health! Yea" make you a millionaire? No. Will it make you happier? Meh. I have no idea. Watch this old fairy dance.

Welcome to HEALTH! YEA! (infomercial GIFS, YEA!)

She's a fairy because she has a wand.

But seriously folks. "HEALTH! YEA." is something that Husband and I are doing everyday. Saturday, we had bacon and eggs but instead of having toast or nothing with it, I made a "breakfast salad" with a shitload of spinach underneath it all to get just a LITTLE MORE vegetables into our system.

Make it a goal to do JUST ONE (more) thing today for health. Yea. :)