But I feel really uneasy about the "I hate my kids" posts (as seen on the MP's Whisper article).

I am confused about them. It seems, really, that these women might be suffering through PPD. It seems they are overwhelmed - is the father helping out? Are they tight on money? Who knows. There are such bigger issues than, "ha ha ha, kids ruin your life!" This sentiment - hating your children - is not something to make light of. Perhaps it is cathartic for mothers to relate to each other in this way - but these women are in pain.

And the ones who aren't in pain, I suppose, are just plain selfish, but I'm not going to make that judgment call on anyone since I'll never know the story. The bottom line is that if these women who are suffering cannot get help or find peace, their children will suffer.

Also, I have a hard time reading the posts that blame the child. I am not a mother, so I know there are pieces missing to my analysis. But I just can't help but think about that poor kid growing up. One of my siblings is the unwanted child, and you can tell. She knows it. There are four of us, and she is a middle child, and she gets the shit end of everything (this is mostly my dad's doing, not as much my mother but she doesn't help).

It breaks my fucking heart. She didn't ask to be born. She was born on purpose - she was chosen. But her timing was in a way that her early years were during a really tough time in our family. Being a toddler, of course she contributed to the chaos.

It's not the same as regretting all of your children and wishing your life was different, bu still. I can't imagine the pain to be an unwanted child.

___

ETA - I realize this post reads like I am implying that women who say these things are abusive, or that having PPD/general mom struggles will make one abusive. I just want to say I am really sorry to anyone I hurt - I should be more careful with my language, and I certainly do not want to perpetuate that myth.