Okay, seriously: HOW, FOR ALL THE IS HOLY, FLUFFY, AND ADORABLE IN THIS (AND EVERY) UNIVERSE, DO YOU PEOPLE EAT AN ENTIRE PLATE OF POUTINE?

Because, sweet merciful cats. I think I'm going to explode.

I went out to the food trucks at LACMA today with the full intention of getting a reasonably healthy marinated tofu and asian veggie sandwich from a banh mi truck that I have frequented in the past.

BUT — at the end of the row of trucks, there it was: fucking Montreal Poutine. So I did what any GTer would do. I squealed and shouted, "OH MY GOD, THERE'S A POUTINE TRUCK HERE. TODAY IS THE GREATEST DAY OF MY LIFE."

People gave me a lot of weird looks. I don't know why.

Anyway, I just got a classic because, for the truck, that was the only vegetarian option. It looks magnificent:

Hey Canadians? Help me out, eh?

I mean, LOOK. AT. IT.

Hey Canadians? Help me out, eh?

I have managed five bites. And I'm going to explode. It's so goddamn magical in my mouth, but everything below that is just like, "NEEEEEERRRRRRP. FU-Q."

HOW DO YOU CANADIANS EAT THIS? TELL ME YOUR GREAT NORTHERN SECRETS SO I CAN KEEP SHOVING DELICIOUS POUTINE IN MY FACE HOLE.