Deep Thoughts: Is it better to be more in love or more loved?

Watching Sense and Sensibility for the gajillionth time has got me thinking: most relationships seem to have some power/love differential, or at least a pursuer and a pursued. Which role makes you happier? Is it better to feel satisfied and safe and just a little like settling, or giddy and euphoric and just a little unsure of how long it will last? Who else has experienced both sides of the coin?

Note: (Clearly in the case of Jane Austen, Willoughby is supposed to be a straight-up asshole, so don't take the comparison too literally...)