Check your waffle privilege

I have, up until this point, been breakfast Switzerland. Or maybe more like breakfast America circa 1914... I'm pretty sure which way I'm leaning but hoping to hang out of the melee and let all y'all duke it out while I check out the latest nickelodeon.

But I can be silent no longer. Some people out there (you know who you are) need to check your waffle privilege.

Let's get real. Waffles and pancakes are the same thing - you can use the same batter for both, the same ingredients go on each. The only difference is that in order to make a waffle you have to have a large, unwieldy machine that wouldn't look out of place in a medieval torture chamber and that only serves one purpose.

That's cool. I'm glad that you guys can afford boutique kitchen equipment with only one earthly function. I'm glad you guys can afford mega mansions with 1 billion square meters of cupboard space with which to store your clunky device you use twice a year. I'm glad you can afford to go out to eat and buy waffles, if you don't make them at home with your Waffletron400K, which not many people know related on the same family tree as both Terminator and Cylon 6. But don't flaunt your privilege here. The rest of us can't just bootstrap ourselves up from this simple frying pan, you know?

Your elitist waffles were just a pipe dream when our hardworking ancestors were exploring the west on a steady diet of pancakes. Waffles are European; pancakes have been made in every continent by every group of people. Don't pretend to be ignorant of the social implications of your choices, Wafflers. And don't come to me, a Pancakeian to educate you.

With all that said, I think we should focus on our similarities, not our differences. We all love breakfast, and blandly sweet carb dishes! We all love toppings and eating something that is more or less dessert as our first meal.

I want our breakfast to be intersectional, guys. I think we can make that happen.